Saturday, May 29, 2010

Some quick thoughts on the movies I watched tonite

Sam went to go get the step kids in New Joisey today and I was off so I had all day to watch movies and dye my hair, which was a nice break. The BFF stopped by and we gossiped for a bit, drank some wine, smoked some cigs, and then I watched me some movies.

First up was Cavalcade favorite David Cronenberg's RABID. I have been a life long fan of Cronenberg, as long time readers know, but I am ashamed to admit having never seen this one before. And being as how we'll be meeting and greeting with DC in Toronto in less than three months, I might as well finish off his filmography beforehand. And of course I wasn't disappointed. Taking queues from SHIVERS (one of my all time faves), we've got body horror to the tenth degree here with ex-porn star Maryl yin Chambers as a victim of a horrendous motorcycle accident receiving skin graphs that turn her into a vampiress of sorts with a 'penis' that comes out of her armpit in order to sate her thirst for blood. Men, women, whathaveyou, it just turns into an all out feast as she infects the general public of Montreal with her brand of rabies. And the casting choices are by no means an accident, as she seems to relish her role and actually does a fairly decent job as infected seductress with a need to feed. I loved it. I have plenty more to say about this one, but suffice it to say, I'm a bit too drunk to be all academic and eloquent, even though I would like to be.

Up next, I watched EMMANUEL AND THE WHITE SLAVE TRADE. No stranger to director Joe D'amato's 'black Emmanuel' films, this was a little different as we see nympho Emmanuel infiltrate a high falutin' prostituion ring for journalistic ends. Okay, maybe it's not all that different, but here we get to see a drag queen get into a kung fu fight in a bowling alley (!) and Emmanuel actually does get raped. Usually, she escapes such unpleasantness with her cunningness, but here, not so much. There's still the James Bondian elements and spy cameras hidden in zippos, and loads of gratuitous nudity and sex, but there's a pretty filthy vibe here, just because sexy Laura Gemser doesn't escape as she usually does. Good stuff none the less and her real life hubby Gabriel Tinti stars as well. I've always found it weird that these two have done so many flicks together, being as how they are just shy of prOn, but hey, they're European.

I'm currently in the midst of the Lon Chaney collection with ACE OF HEARTS but am taking a break to write this and drink some more wine. It's tragic how Chaney always loved from a distance in his films. Think about it. It's a recurring thing in all his movies. I would have loved him up close and personal.

I have to work breakfast in the morn, but I assure you, more movies will be watched and processed. As I'm watching all this glorious stuff from the seventies and even the twenties, I hate mainstream movies all the more. If I have to make one more cosmo because of all the bitches coming in my restaurant because Sex and the City 2 is playing I may kill myself. Seriously, I got an order for eight cosmos on one ticket the other night! Kill me now!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

New VHS collection additions

I took Bruce out for Vietnamese food and wine for his birfday tonite and then we went to the local old school throwback video store that's like five blocks from my house. Here's what I got out of them for nine bucks! THE CLOWN MURDERS starring John Candy, blogworthy alone just based on the fact that it's got killer clowns and John Candy. THE WITCH WHO CAME FROM THE SEA which I've coveted for awhile since I read about in my Nightmare USA book. THE LEGEND OF BIGFOOT big box, so sweet and WATCH ME WHILE I KILL, which I know I've heard about and wanted to see forever for whatever reason. And all for the low low price of nine dollars!! Sweet! I couldn't have been more pleased. Clamshells, big boxes, and spicy cuisine. Who could ask for anything else?

I love it when I have a good night off.

Please to note a very fat 31-pound Tuna Cat in the frame outside the pic. Very nice.

Monday, May 17, 2010

Cronenberg, yo!

So this year's Rue Morgue Fear of Fear's guest of honor is David motherfuckin' Cronenberg! You know I'm getting my tickets the second they go on sale. (AND, as a wonderful, I couldn't have planned it any better incentive to go to Toronto at the end of August, The Specials are playing two shows while we'll be there. Got my tickets for that shit already, ya know it.) Lance Henricksen's gonna be there and Glenn Danzig, too, although I've met Danzig - don't know if I ever told ya'll the story, but it is hilarious - remind me - it's a blog post of it's own - amongst other notables and what have you, so consider me filled with glee. Gives me something to look forward to while I slave away pouring beer and making stupid martinis.

I went to FoF in 2007 when Dario Argento was the guest of honor and it was absolutely fantastic. Not only was he charming and precious, seriously, he was precious, the convention was really well organized and put together and Toronto is a beautiful city. I did break out in hives all over my body for most of the time we were there (something in the hotel sheets, maybe?), but it was seriously one of the best trips of my life. Get your passports out and meet me there.


Tell me it isn't true?? Is Ronnie James Dio dead? Word around the interwebs says it's so, but I can't get a confirmation! Tell me no! I'll be throwing the devil horns while tipping my forty if this shit's fo' real.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Watching Your Grandpa Play Some Punk Rock

Yeah, it's almost three am and I had a shot of jamesons and about six beers and just watched the Buzzcocks rock out (if you want to call it that) in DC and then drove all the way home, but dammit I'm awake and having a glass of wine. And I want to tell ya'll about the show. So you know I love me some of that good old fashioned punk rawk and when I heard the Buzzcocks were starting their new tour in DC, you know Sam and I had to go. So I bought us some tickets at some twenty five bucks a piece (remember when punk shows were five bucks?) and we drove the hour and a half to the nation's capital to see us a punk rock show.

Now I know these dudes have been around for a coon's age (love that expression) and I wasn't expecting TOO much, but I certainly wasn't expecting a punk rock jam band. We were promised the first two records in their entirety and what we got was a good opening and then a diversion into complete jam bandery complete with drum solos. They left the pretension at the door - no unnecessary babbling - although there was a bit - but I couldn't understand it because of their thick Bolton accents -, which was nice, considering they're old as fuck and could likely be just as pretencious as say, John Lydon, but that was not the case, which was refreshing. However, frontman Pete Shelley was wearing a Mondrian inspired button down and the drummer and bassist were obviously new, as in younger than seventy, and were mouthing the wrong words to the songs throughout the set. I had to go outside to smoke about halfway through and even then, didn't really want to go back inside.

Sam and I lost each other as he made his way up to dance, but then lost interest when he noticed the exact same things I noticed and decided to go get a drink. We met back up with each other, expressed our concerns, had a beer at the bar next door to the club, and proceeded to the DC drunken eating spot, Ben's Chili Bowl, for some after hours fries and burgers to bitch some more about how much fun we didn't have.

That's not to say we didn't have fun, tho. If you know me, I could have fun in a cardboard box given the right amount of alcohol and the right crowd. And Sam and I always enjoy each other's company and getting the fuck out of town whenever we have a chance. Which lately, is often. So good times. Whatever. Just avoid watching old people play punk rock. It sucks to say, but seriously. Considering we're both on our way to being old. It could have been my dad up there in a very wrong polo shirt trying to recapture his youth and getting exhausted and run down and trying to act they he's having a good time but not really. But in the best way possible. If that makes sense.

Have a good night! Love you all!

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Fooligan's Revenge

So my honey Sam has started a blog of his own and you guys should check it out. He loves them there horror movies we're all so fond of, but he's also a scooter aficionado (he rides a '79 Vespa), has excellent taste in music (ska, soul, reggae, punk - the good shit), and is an all around great dude (although I might be a bit biased in that regard). We've been a bit busy around the Cavalcade - mostly working, drinking, and going to shows - but he promises to update more than I have been lately - which I swear I will rectify very soon. I watched IN A GLASS CAGE tonight - what a fucked up piece that was and we sat through the slowest burn evar - BORN OF FIRE, but weren't entirely disappointed. So stuff has been watched, processed, noted, and put through the ringer around here. Oh well. Get used to my excuses. I can really be a lazy bastard. Especially since I threw my back out falling two nights in a row (one after a party trying to turn the light on in my hallway and the other trying to scale the brick wall behind my house to break onto the balcony after locking myself out on a wine purchasing excursion) and dancing too hard in brand new platforms at a soul show. Anyway....

You can check Sam out here and find out all about our adventures, show experiences, movies watchings, and other crap. And of course, cats. Lots of cats.

Love you!